February Podcast: Running After Baby, Getting Started, Raising Eaters, Cals vs. Points, Habit Eating | Roni's Weigh

February Podcast: Running After Baby, Getting Started, Raising Eaters, Cals vs. Points, Habit Eating | Roni's Weigh:

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I just finished watching this podcast of Roni Noone's, and I thought she had some sensible things to say. What really got me, though, was her comments at the end about habit eating. I have had that same "the kids are in bed -- it's time to eat!" sorts of associations -- in all kinds of various situations, and have tried hard to break them. The car trip comment she made though was so spot on for me. She said that when she and her dh travel, he will get a soda and some combos at the gas station, and then if she doesn't get a snack, she will end up feeling deprived. So, even though she may not be hungry, she takes along a bag of popcorn popped at home to munch on. It's funny -- I have the same husband! He'll buy Combos, the kids will beg for snacks, and everyone will be munching away in the car except me. Though I may not be the slightest bit hungry, I end up feeling kind of resentful and angry about the situation. I always try to tell myself not to eat if I'm not hungry, or to take some healthy snacks for the family, but as soon as dh buys some unhealthy snack and my kids clamor for one also, no one ends up eating the healthy snacks but me. Sometimes I end up eating more calories than I would have had I just given in to my desire for some potato chips! So maybe it's okay to give up the whole intuitive eating thing once in a while. Rather than forcing myself into a situation when I'll feel put upon for listening to my stomach, I should just listen to my desires instead. Not every day, or even every week, but at least some of the time.

A Doughnut is Just a Doughnut

I had a slight gain at home last week, but a slight loss at WW. I think I'd believe the loss more, since I overate a lot last Saturday at my daughter's party, but ended the week at -2 points. I wore three pair of pants last week that I hadn't been able to wear for at least 18 months, and I felt quite good about that.

My daughter's school had "Family Donut Day" last week. I looked up a glazed doughnut and saw that it was 7 points, so I ate just some egg whites and veggies for breakfast that day, planning to eat and enjoy a doughnut. They were getting the treats from a local bakery that is famous for its fabulous doughnuts, so I wanted to have one. When I got it and took a bite, I thought "Hmm. It tastes like any other glazed doughnut I've ever eaten". I had two more bites and chewed them slowly, just to make sure, but yep, it was nothing exciting or special. It sat next to me for an hour while I handed out tickets to families coming in the door, and then I threw it away. I didn't feel any regret about it, either. It was just a doughnut with no magical powers or forbidden appeal.

Yesterday I baked chocolate chip cookies, always a huge temptation for me. I wondered if perhaps I was making a mistake because I'd been having those "I want to sit around and eat junk" urges all morning. To help out somewhat, I made a pan cookie instead of a zillion scooped cookies. I ate one small bit of dough, and enough small tastes of the finished bar to equal about two cookies. I counted the points and felt okay about the whole thing. I sort of wished I'd just eaten two cookies though, rather than just a bunch of little tastes while I was cutting them and putting them away. I could have had one nicely sized cookie with a cup of decaf and thoroughly enjoyed it. Next time. I'm taking most of them to a school fundraiser the elementary school is having today, but I left about eight of them for us. I don't know that I'll eat any more, but they are there if I want one.

I'm going to a baby shower today. I don't know if there will be food there, since it's at 2pm. Maybe cake. If it's a supermarket cake, I don't know that I'll even be tempted to eat it. Can you say "partially hydrogenated oil"? Ew.

My hip has been bothering me lately, and I'm wondering if I need to cut back on the exercise a bit. I usually walk at least 10,000 steps a day, in addition to doing 50 min of elliptical or stationary bike, and only take one rest day a week. That doesn't seem excessive to me, but a couple of years ago, my hip was bothering me for a while, and when I really cut back on exercising for a while, the soreness went away. My knee has been hurting too. I thought when I got below 150 (I think I'm 153 right now), it wouldn't really hurt much anymore. So today is a rest day. I walked the dog 2 miles this morning, but will probably not do much the rest of the day. The shower is over an hour's drive, and then I'll be sitting on my behind there for a while before driving back home another hour plus.

Binge and Recovery

I took my healthy-ish snacks to the Super Bowl party we attended. Unfortunately, I sampled quite a bit of them before I went, and wasn't really hungry when I got there. I say unfortunately because I still struggle a bit with not eating when everyone around me IS eating, even when I'm not hungry in the least. Eating when I'm not hungry invariably leads to overeating because I don't have an "end" point. There's no "I feel much better now that my stomach isn't empty, so I will stop now" cue. Needless to say, I DID eat at the party, and ended up feeling a bit too full. In the danger zone, I headed home to put my girls to bed. When I got home, I started by eating two of the doughnuts that were in our refrigerator, and went on from there. It wasn't the worst binge I ever had, but I went to bed feeling terrible - emotionally and physically stuffed. Not only did I feel miserable -- bloated and hot (I always get too hot after bingeing -- maybe my metabolism going crazy?), but about half an hour after I went to bed, my heart started pounding. I was seriously afraid that I was going to have a heart attack or something. It was the first time that I really thought about what bingeing must do to my body, rather than thinking only of the calories I ate, why I ate them, and how much damage I'd see on the scale.

I hesitate to say this (having had to admit to setbacks many times in the past...), but I'm not sure I will ever binge like that again. I've never been that afraid -- not even when I shattered my leg or had my mastectomy. If I'd had a heart attack, I would have done it to myself. There would be no one else to blame. Unlike previous binge aftermath feelings of hopelessness, the next day I felt stronger and more determined to eat normally. I simply wasn't very hungry for the next day or two, so I listened to my body and ate only 23 points Monday and 26 on Tuesday. I stuck to vegetables, beans, and fruit, and nothing processed. Since then, I've had two WW weeks when I haven't gone over my points. I've not gone hungry, but I've not overeaten at very many meals. I think I ended up not gaining weight over my binge, but whether I did or not, I've had a nice loss for two weeks in a row now. I haven't seen this new low weight in quite a few years.

On Valentine's Day, we went out to dinner. I had 20+ points left for the week, so I tried not to worry about how much oil was in my (vegan) dinner or my salad dressing. It was so yummy that I ate all of my portion, and ended up a little too full. I declined dessert, and when we got home, I thought, "Oh, I could probably still eat a Hershey's Kiss or two for a bit of dessert", but honestly, it didn't really appeal to me. I was full -- a bit overfull -- and chocolate just didn't sound very good. Crazy, huh? I made a cheesecake in the slow cooker last weekend, and after the first piece, it sat in the fridge because it just wasn't good enough to waste my points on. Of course, I did eat the entire 8-point, not-great piece the first night when I really could have stopped after a few bites -- when I realized it wasn't all that exciting. Progress though.

The Glacial Pace of Healthy Weight Loss

At last week's WW weigh in, I'd lost the weight I gained plus an additional .2 lbs. I was pretty happy, though one always wishes for more. It never ceases to amaze me how quickly weight goes on and how incredibly slowly it seems to go away. Truly though, I think SEEMS is the watchword here. When I look at my WW stats, I've lost an average of .9 lbs since I joined on November 30. I've eaten an average of 45 points a day, so I definitely haven't been starving myself. Truth be told, I could have eaten less many days if I had truly been eating intuitively. Last night, I ate a bit past full because my roasted veggie pizza was so yummy. Anyway, even at .9 lbs a week, I could lose the 12 lbs I need to lose to have a "normal" BMI in just over 13 weeks. That's a blink in a lifetime. I keep reminding myself that I am eating the way I need to eat for my health. I will need to eat like this every day for the rest of my life if I want to stay healthy. So, if I'm not willing to do it now, I won't keep off any weight I lose. I'm living without the comforting fullness of a belly full of cookies, but also without the knee pain that was sometimes keeping me awake at night a couple of months ago.

Our WW meeting last week was a bit better. We discussed the difference between snacks and treats. Our leader talked about things that are "treats" (different for everyone, but for me might be things like graham crackers or snack bars) versus "snacks" (anything that you like, tastes good, but doesn't tempt you to eat multiple servings of). I had never thought about it in that way, but she made the point that something that is okay for a snack isn't necessarily okay to eat 2-3 times a day for a snack. If you are depriving yourself of healthy foods because you are using your points for things like graham crackers or Kind bars, you are fooling yourself if you think it doesn't make a difference. Oddly, this is at odds with her "one point hot dog" speech last month, when she said that WW doesn't tell you what to eat, but rather how to maximize your points (with things like 1 point hot dogs). She actually said, "the kind of food you use your points on makes a difference."

I made three healthy-ish snacks for the Super Bowl party we're attending tonight. I adapted a Buffalo Chicken Dip recipe and made it into a Buffalo Bean Dip, and made a recipe from the Weight Watchers handout they gave us last week, substituting vegetarian chili for turkey chili. I was given the choice to bring cookies and veggies or hearty appetizers, but I really didn't want to deal with the temptation of making cookies. I know I won't go the rest of my life without baking or eating cookies, but it is a food I have difficulty eating just one of. I suppose I could have just bought some, but there's something about the idea of buying those bakery cookies with partially hydrogenated oil in them that just makes me queasy. There was cake served at my daughter's play on Friday night and I wasn't very tempted by it Thinking of that greasy tasting frosting and all those trans fats just turned me off. Imagine that.